« previous next »
Pages: [1]

Author Topic:  (Read 919 times)

Offline thatoneguy92088

  • Trade Count: (0)
  • Sergeant First Class
  • *****
  • Posts: 301
    • View Profile
(No subject)
« on: April 08, 2004, 08:59:10 PM »
<blockquote id="quote"><font size="1" face="Verdana" id="quote">quote:<hr height="1" noshade id="quote"><i>Originally posted by Trashcan</i>
<br />An email I got from my dad, I thought it was hilarious :)

<blockquote id="quote"><font size="1" face="Verdana" id="quote">quote:<hr height="1" noshade id="quote">
P: Number 3 engine missing.
S: Engine found on right wing after brief search.

P: Aircraft handles funny.
S: Aircraft warned to straighten up, fly right, and be serious.

P: Target radar hums.
S: Reprogrammed target radar with lyrics.

P: Mouse in cockpit.
S: Cat installed.

P: Noise coming from under instrument panel. Sounds like a midget pounding on something with a hammer.
S: Took hammer away from midget.
<hr height="1" noshade id="quote"></blockquote id="quote"></font id="quote">
<hr height="1" noshade id="quote"></blockquote id="quote"></font id="quote">

I would have to say that these were the best, but they all made me crack up.
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 05:00:00 PM by thatoneguy92088 »
Logged

Offline Victor3

  • Trade Count: (0)
  • Sergeant Major
  • *****
  • Posts: 622
    • View Profile
(No subject)
« Reply #1 on: April 09, 2004, 08:46:59 AM »
Funny stuff...thanks.
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 05:00:00 PM by Victor3 »
Logged
"Victor3"
Airsoft AZ
Eat Hot Lead...uh...I mean Plastic!!

Offline Harley

  • Trade Count: (0)
  • Major General
  • *****
  • Posts: 2254
    • View Profile
(No subject)
« Reply #2 on: April 09, 2004, 09:00:54 AM »
I've seen this one before... it is funny and I can see some of these smart ass mechanics writing up responces like.
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 05:00:00 PM by Harley »
Logged
\"Just because you\'re paranoid, doesn\'t mean they\'re not out to get you!\"

\"Have Gun - Will Travel\"

Offline Paco

  • Trade Count: (0)
  • Brigadier General
  • *****
  • Posts: 1507
    • View Profile
(No subject)
« Reply #3 on: April 09, 2004, 09:44:59 AM »
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 05:00:00 PM by Paco »
Logged

Offline Harley

  • Trade Count: (0)
  • Major General
  • *****
  • Posts: 2254
    • View Profile
(No subject)
« Reply #4 on: April 09, 2004, 10:16:50 AM »
Awe don't take away our fun Paco, we all know it wasn't for real.  Heck the FAA would shut down any airline with maintenence records like that.
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 05:00:00 PM by Harley »
Logged
\"Just because you\'re paranoid, doesn\'t mean they\'re not out to get you!\"

\"Have Gun - Will Travel\"

Offline Paco

  • Trade Count: (0)
  • Brigadier General
  • *****
  • Posts: 1507
    • View Profile
(No subject)
« Reply #5 on: April 09, 2004, 10:35:32 AM »
lol...  Well, if you check the link, snopes doesn't identify it as real or not.  In fact, they say that it could be all true (as a result of a compilation of a number of maintenance reports), all false or some true and some made up.  [:p]
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 05:00:00 PM by Paco »
Logged

Offline azsarge

  • Trade Count: (0)
  • General
  • *****
  • Posts: 9999
    • View Profile
(No subject)
« Reply #6 on: April 10, 2004, 04:25:18 PM »
<blockquote id="quote"><font size="1" face="Verdana" id="quote">quote:<hr height="1" noshade id="quote">Problem - Friction locks cause throttle levers to stick.
Solution - That's what they are there for!<hr height="1" noshade id="quote"></blockquote id="quote"></font id="quote">

That's my favorite.  It's funnier if you know what they mean...
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 05:00:00 PM by azsarge »
Logged

Offline leakingpen

  • Trade Count: (0)
  • Master Sergeant
  • *****
  • Posts: 392
    • View Profile
(No subject)
« Reply #7 on: April 15, 2004, 12:34:59 PM »
ditto sarge.  this one is just as funny for the same reason

Defect: Turn & slip indicator ball stuck in center during turns.
Action: Congratulations. You just made your first coordinated turn
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 05:00:00 PM by leakingpen »
Logged

Offline Trashcan

  • Trade Count: (0)
  • Staff Sergeant
  • *****
  • Posts: 224
    • View Profile
Airplane humor
« Reply #8 on: April 08, 2004, 03:51:07 PM »
An email I got from my dad, I thought it was hilarious :)

<blockquote id="quote"><font size="1" face="Verdana" id="quote">quote:<hr height="1" noshade id="quote">After every flight, pilots fill out a form called a gripe sheet, which conveys to the mechanics problems encountered with the aircraft during the flight that need repair or correction. The mechanics read and correct the problem, and then respond in writing on the lower half of the form what remedial action was taken, and the pilot reviews the gripe sheets before the next flight.

Never let it be said that ground crews and engineers lack a sense of humor. Here are some actual logged maintenance complaints and problems as submitted by Quanta’s pilots and the solution recorded by maintenance engineers. By the way, Quantas is the only major airline that has never had an accident!

(P = The problem logged by the pilot.)
(S = The solution and action taken by the mechanics.)

P: Left inside main tire almost needs replacement.
S: Almost replaced left inside main tire.

P: Test flight OK, except auto-land very rough.
S: Auto-land not installed on this aircraft.

P: Something loose in cockpit.
S: Something tightened in cockpit.

P: Dead bugs on windshield.
S: Live bugs on back-order.

P: Autopilot in altitude-hold mode produces a 200 feet per minute descent.
S: Cannot reproduce problem on ground.

P: Evidence of leak on right main landing gear.
S: Evidence removed.

P: DME volume unbelievably loud.
S: DME volume set to more believable level.

P: Friction locks cause throttle levers to stick.
S: That's what they're there for.

P: IFF inoperative.
S: IFF always inoperative in OFF mode.

P: Suspected crack in windshield.
S: Suspect you're right.

P: Number 3 engine missing.
S: Engine found on right wing after brief search.

P: Aircraft handles funny.
S: Aircraft warned to straighten up, fly right, and be serious.

P: Target radar hums.
S: Reprogrammed target radar with lyrics.

P: Mouse in cockpit.
S: Cat installed.

P: Noise coming from under instrument panel. Sounds like a midget pounding on something with a hammer.
S: Took hammer away from midget.
<hr height="1" noshade id="quote"></blockquote id="quote"></font id="quote">
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 05:00:00 PM by Trashcan »
Logged
Pages: [1]
« previous next »